Confession #1-I’ve been nervous about taking a sabbatical since I first heard about it. Fear, straight up, is a more honest way to describe what I’ve been feeling. I couldn’t imagine not going to work and doing what I love for 30 days. Just so you know, in the last few weeks, I have come to terms with stepping away, and I’m ready!
Confession #2- When I first started as a Select Producer in March 2015, it took me awhile to get going. My first 8 months were not the easiest, and I actually turned in my resignation in month 6. I was going to sell life insurance- ha!!
Well, I’m not sure what happened, but I decided to ask if I could stay at my job, and FD graciously said yes! In December, I went to my first annual meeting, and I fell in love with the culture, the vision, and the people at FD. I met the famous Adam Kraut who dominated the top of the leaderboard and vowed to chase him to the top of that board. I didnt make it, but I had fun trying!
Here’s the biggest confession and why I need this sabbatical: I like competition. I like to win. I like to set crazy goals and do all I can to achieve them. I am obsessed with the numbers, and I put ridiculous pressure on myself to succeed. I go into a depression if I don’t sell a certain amount in a month. I’ve spent most of this year depressed because my numbers aren’t good….not like last year’s. Never mind that I serve lots of families. I have been focusing on trips and leaderboards and commission checks. I am tired. Tired of pushing, tired of competing….really with nobody but myself.
So, this sabbatical is for rest and finding balance at work and home. It’s the mental break I need most. It’s the connection with family and friends that I crave. So, Saturday I went to Amarillo to celebrate my best friend’s birthday. That night, my daughter’s family drove in from Ft Worth. Sunday night, we had a family cookout and saw our 2 month old grandson. Today is Monday, and my grands are still here……and I’m not at work!! I’m not afraid to take a break and to bow out of the race for awhile. I’m not worried about commissions and leaderboards and trips today. This is my time, and I’m so grateful to work for a company that believes in caring for its employees. Thank you FDLIC! It’s gonna be a great 30 days.